I bought a new canoe, and to help you celebrate with me, I’ve decided to run a little contest. I’m excited, so I figured the best way to get people excited for me is to bribe them with some free stuff.
A few posts ago, I wrote that I had worked with the Swift Canoe and Kayak guys to help me learn a bit more about their canoes, but more importantly, to help me choose a new canoe. Just like most people, I can’t go around buying canoes all the time, so I really had to make my choice count. After agonizing about what model to get, with what features – not to even mention the painfully difficult choice of colour(s) – I’ve finally made my decision. I’m a pretty happy Portageur, let me tell you. (Also happy: the people around me who no longer have to constantly hear about my “agonizing choice”.)
So to help me celebrate, to have a little fun, and keep me preoccupied while I wait for my canoe to be built, I’ll set up a little contest. All you have to do is guess the model, material and colour(s) I’ve chosen.
The prize is a package I put together the same way I like to buy gifts: Based on a common interest. People who know me know that I like good coffee at the campfire, not to mention stuff with the Portageur logo, and so the winner will receive one of the following:
Portageur hat – the very same style as worn by Portageur himself (I know!)
Portageur t-shirt – choice of sizes large or extra-large
Portageur decal – a high demand item you can stick on your favourite gear or vehicle
In the upcoming weeks I’ll post some of the guesses on Twitter and Facebook (in fact, there may be some hints there). Depending on how well you guys guess, I may offer up some other hints to make things easier, but to get the guessing started, the first 3 people who guess correctly I’ll send a Portageur t-shirt. The draw will take place on Monday, June 18th, so I’ll accept guesses up to midnight June 17th. Hopefully, if I’ve picked up my canoe before then I won’t go blabbing, but I can’t guarantee that – I am pretty excited.
The Fine1 Print
The winner will be chosen from a random draw of all correctest2 guesses, based on how many elements [model, colour(s), material] are correctly guessed.
Enter as often as you like, but only one guess per day.
I’m so sorry, but I’m afraid only people living in Canada are eligible to win3. It’s a shipping cost thing.
Also not eligible are close friends or family of Portageur or Swift Canoe and Kayaks4.
Entering this contest will make you feel good and more good looking5.
Note that the use of “fine” in this case means “small” and not “okay”, “fancy” or “sexy” print. I’m just alluding to the practice of having details in smaller print, thereby making this contest seem on the level of those run by big companies – kind of like using terms like “thereby”.
“Correctness” is totally a real word.
I know, it sucks that you read this far down and aren’t eligible. Sorry. Perhaps for the next contest I’ll be richer and more famous and can ship around the world. So if you want to participate in the future contests, tell your friends about portageur.ca.
I’m not really sure how to say this in legalese, but basically if you can look it up or I’ve talked to you about my canoe, it wouldn’t be fair to the others – Fiona!.
This might not be entirely true. It seemed like all the fine print was negative, so I threw in something positive. I can’t guarantee that you’ll feel good entering the contest, but you’re already attractive.
I was going to make a joke about selling them to the highest bidder or soliciting dates, but it’s been my experience that if there’s two things you don’t joke about on the internet it’s stalking and spam.